Oktoberfest

If you've always dreamed of taking part in the beer-soaked sausage and sauerkraut extravaganza that is the German holiday of Oktoberfest but you barely even have enough money to afford the mortgage payments on your Toronto real estate, much less airfare to Europe, you'll be pleased to know you have a Canadian alternative. The large ethnically German populations of Waterloo and Kitchener (which used to be called 'Berlin' before World War I) have re-created the festival atmosphere right here in Ontario. This article provides an overview of the festivities, which you will undoubtedly end up taking part in if you're going to be living there.

Each year on the Friday before Canadian thanksgiving (that's in October, for all you Americans out there) all the executive search firms, Toronto trading companies, and schools shut down for the first day of the nine day Oktoberfest celebration. The organizers bill it to tourists and visitors as Canada's Greatest Bavarian Festival and it has made the record books for the biggest Oktoberfest celebration outside Germany. Each year it attracts over 700,000 people. The festival's mascot is a character names Onkel Hans, a fat man in traditional Bavarian dress.

The festival isn't put on by TV stations and high rise developers like the Parc Nuvo Group purely for the tourism draw, it's funded by a lottery administered by a number of German clubs in the twin cities area. These German clubs: the Alpine Club, the Concordia Club, the German-Canadian Hunting and Fishing Club, the Schwaben Club, and the Transylvania Club, are almost all based in Kitchener. They also own the facilities, called festhallen, in which many of the festival's events take place. Other events are hosted in tents set up for that purpose or in other clubs and bars throughout the cities.

During the festival you can try various German beers, listen to traditional polka music, and eat a variety of sausages hot enough to have been cooked in a wall mounted boiler. The events also include a ceremonial keg tapping, a free pancake breakfast, a barrel race, a treasure hunt, a car show, rock and hip-hop concerts, a parade, games and competitions for dog owners, a gay pride event, and a special party night for each of the cities colleges: the University of Waterloo, Wilfred Laurier University, and Conestoga College.

If you're the attention-seeking and/or beautiful type, you can apply to participate in the Miss Oktoberfest Pageant. The event used to be a televised continent-spanning affair with enough funding to buy Toronto condos for the finalists, but today is a closed-panel affair with the winner selected from within the community. To win, you must be female, have a high degree of community involvement, and a well-rounded character. If you're unfortunately disqualified on the basis of being male, try the spin-off cross dressing pageants at the local high schools.

As the popularity of the festival spirals, more and more family oriented outside events are tacking themselves on to Oktoberfest to capitalize on the tourist influx. To find out what this year's additional events will be, visit the official website here.